I have heard “I hate the dentist” more times than I can count. And I want you to know: I never take it personally. What I hear when a patient says that is not a criticism of me specifically — it is a signal that someone has had a difficult experience, or has been carrying fear about dental care for years, sometimes decades. And I take that seriously.
Dental anxiety and dentophobia (a clinical fear of dental treatment) are remarkably common. Research suggests that between 13% and 24% of people worldwide experience significant dental anxiety — and up to 36% of Americans report some level of fear around dental visits. You are not unusual. You are not being dramatic. And you are absolutely welcome here.
Where Dental Fear Usually Comes From
In my experience, dental fear almost always traces back to one of a few origins:
- A painful or traumatic experience during childhood
- Feeling out of control during a procedure — unable to communicate discomfort
- Embarrassment about the state of one’s teeth, leading to avoidance that compounds the anxiety
- A previous provider who did not take the time to explain what was happening or listen when the patient was uncomfortable
- Sensory sensitivities to sounds, smells, or the sensation of instruments in the mouth
Understanding where your fear comes from is actually the first step in working through it. And talking to your dentist about it — before your appointment even begins — is one of the most effective things you can do.
“The bravest thing an anxious patient can do is show up. Everything after that, we handle together.”
What I Do Differently for Anxious Patients
The moment a patient tells me they are nervous, my entire approach changes — not because I treat anxious patients differently, but because I pay closer attention. Specifically:
- We talk first. Before I pick up a single instrument, we talk. About what you’re worried about, what has happened before, and what would help you feel more in control today.
- You establish a stop signal. Raise your left hand and everything stops. No exceptions. This is non-negotiable in my practice.
- I narrate as I go. I describe what I’m about to do before I do it, every single time. No surprises.
- We go at your pace. If you need a moment, we take a moment.
- We can break it up. There is no rule that says everything has to happen in one appointment.
Practical Techniques That Help Before and During Your Visit
Beyond what we do in the office, there are things you can do to genuinely reduce anxiety in the lead-up to your appointment:
- Schedule your appointment for a time when you’re not rushed or already stressed — mid-morning on a calm weekday is often ideal
- Bring headphones and your own music or podcast — auditory distraction is one of the most effective anxiety reducers during dental procedures
- Practice slow nasal breathing in the chair — in for 4 counts, hold for 4, out for 4
- Tell us you’re nervous when you call to book — we will note it and make sure the whole team knows
- Consider scheduling a “no procedure” first visit just to meet us and see the space before anything clinical happens
When Anxiety Is Severe
For some patients, anxiety is significant enough that traditional techniques are not quite enough. In those cases, we can discuss options like nitrous oxide (“laughing gas”), which is safe, effective, and wears off quickly. For more complex situations, we can also refer you to a specialist who works exclusively with high-anxiety patients.
The one thing I hope you take from this post is that dental avoidance always makes things worse — and dental anxiety is entirely manageable with the right support. You deserve healthy teeth and gums. You also deserve to get there without suffering. Come see us. We’ve got you.
With warmth,
Dr. Sharifa Walker, DMD